Acknowledging Miscarriage Limbo
Every story shared in Mums of the Hills adds another thread to the beautiful, messy, and powerful tapestry of our community. The intention of this blog is simple: to acknowledge an experience that many mums have spoken about in Mums of the Hills, but that is rarely talked about openly — the painful in-between stage of a missed miscarriage.
For those who haven’t been through it, this is how Miscarriage Australia explains it:
“A missed miscarriage or a silent miscarriage is when the embryo or foetus has died but remains in the womb (uterus). Often there are no symptoms of a missed miscarriage. Although you may experience some vaginal discharge that is brown coloured and your usual pregnancy symptoms may become less noticeable. You may find out that you have miscarried during a routine check-up.”
For some mums, we’ve heard that still experienced nausea, exhaustion, sore breasts, and the feeling of being pregnant, even though they knew the pregnancy was no longer continuing. It can be an incredibly isolating and cruel stage, a limbo where your body, your heart, and the medical system don’t feel in sync. This waiting time can feel unbearable — physically, as you deal with ongoing symptoms without the hope that usually carries you through; emotionally, as you hold grief while still moving through daily routines that constantly remind you of pregnancy; and practically, as you face delays in accessing treatment or wait for your body to naturally pass the miscarriage.
Two mums recently shared their own experiences through MOTHs public page. Both spoke about how the community stepped up in practical and emotional ways - from providing meals and medical advice, to surrounding them with empathy and solidarity.
We wanted to write this blog so that if someone reading is currently in this painful waiting stage, they know they are not alone and that there are supports available.
What Mums Said Helped During Miscarriage Limbo?
Losing a pregnancy can stir up many emotions, especially when you’ve already started to bond with your baby. Grief and sadness can stay with you for a long time, and that’s completely natural. However you feel, please know there’s no right or wrong way to go through this, your feelings are valid, and you don’t have to carry them alone. Some of the supports mums have found helpful include:
Medical guidance: talking to a GP, hospital, or specialist about timelines and treatment options.
Miscarriage Australia provides evidence-based information, acknowledgement, and advice regarding miscarriage. https://miscarriageaustralia.com.au/
Miscarriage for partners: https://miscarriageaustralia.com.au/finding-miscarriage-support/for-partners/
Peer support networks:
Pink Elephants Support Network: peer support and resources: https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/
Red Nose - https://rednose.org.au/
SANDS – 24/7 support for miscarriage, stillbirth, and newborn death: https://supportconnect.org.au/support-options/sands-miscarriage-stillbirth-newborn-death-support-helpline
Local and practical help: meals, childcare, or simply having someone sit with you. While these can be organised by friends and family, groups such as Foothills Community Care could also help.
Emotional support: counselling, or phone lines like Beyond Blue (24/7: 1300 22 4636).
If you’ve been through this yourself and feel comfortable, we invite you to share your experience (anonymously or named) so that other mums may feel less alone. Sometimes, hearing “me too” is the greatest gift of all.
To all who have walked through miscarriage limbo: your grief is valid, your strength is real, and you are not alone.